four months without is is way to long it don't even seem possible. i still see your beautiful face smiling at me like it was yesterday. lately i put on this face to show people i am ok but it is a mask.i hide my hurt and my pain everyday. everything makes me wanna cry. my doctor says im depressed which i already knew. how could i not be i lost you. if i could have one wish in the whole world i would wish you back here with me. i miss you so much lex. i finally got the cemetery done and it is so beautiful.you would love your veiw of the lake.it kills me having to go there and see your name on the stone knowing your not coming back and there is nothing i can do to bring you back. i guess seeing your name on the stone brought it all into reality for me. i guess i have been going on these last few months hoping and praying it wasn't true. i wish i could have you back to see your face and hear your laugh. to hug you and hold on to you and never let you go. i'm gonna go for now babygirl. just know there isn't a single minute or a single day i don't think about you and miss you. always in my heart and on my mind. loving and missing you always and forever babygirl.
love always and forever,
mom